Magical Thinking

For as many years as I can remember I’ve lived by the paradigm that an artist cannot survive on their art alone (at least as seen in my family).  And so as I put my budget together, my stomach was rolling with each line item, and I kept thinking of all the different ways I could make some extra cash to pay for it all, or maybe how much further I could press my credit cards.  (been there, done that).

But somewhere along the line, some of the new things I’ve been learning and studying must have sunk in because this morning I woke up with a new thought:  What if I believed that this time I could produce this piece without having to take a second job to pay for it, without having to put even more money on my credit cards to meet the costs.

I’m remembering an old fable, I can’t remember from where (and if this is even exactly it).  A thirsty woman is told she will be granted anything she wants, and what she asks for is a cup of water.  Abracadabra, she is granted a silver goblet filled with cool water.  Next to her another thirsty woman is asked what she wants and she asks for a well. Abracadabra, this woman receives a deep stone well filled with an endless depth of cool water.

When the first woman sees the gift her neighbor received, she asks why she only got the cup.  The response … “My dear, you only asked for a cup of water and that is exactly what you received…”

That is what I have been accustomed to wishing for:  a cup of water.  Thinking perhaps that was all I deserved; that if I didn’t make it happen, it never would.  But what if I believed that women (and men) would resonate with what I was creating, this healing of the feminine body and soul and that they would be willing to join my journey.  What if this time,  for the first time, I believed that I would find the supporters, the angels, the investors who would help me get this production on its feet?

I want to hold this new paradigm to my heart.  It is high time to finally believe that this work is worth doing fully, soulfully and that it will gather the participants in its wake.

This new paradigm where  I  get the support, the financing, the love that I need for it.  This new paradigm where I surprise myself with  my own magical thinking that all of this is  exquisitely possible.  Would this not be a wonderful thing?

 

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